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Mizz F. Sez:

You should make your own crack. And here's how:

To make crack, which is cocaine in a purified, hardened form, it is the first necessary to make cocaine. The process begins in the Andes of South America, with the native coca shrub. Coca leaves contain minute amounts of the alkaloid cocaine. To extract it from the plant, you should soak the leaves in an acid solution composed of about a pound of sulfuric acid for every 45 gallons of water. The leaves must soak for 12-18 hours. If all goes well, a brownish tea, called caldo (Spanish for broth) is produced. The caldo is strained into a second vat, where the acid is neutralized by the addition of lime; then kerosene, an organic solvent, is stirred in. The mixture is decanted into a second acid solution, containing 1 ½ tablespoons of sulfuric acid per liter of water. Into the mix goes sodium bicarbonate, and voila, a batch of coca paste is born. To remove impurities from the crumbly paste, coke manufacturers dissolve it in acetone, heat it, and run through a press. Once rinsed, coca paste is again diluted in acetone and then mixed with a solution of acetone, ether, and hydrochloric acid. The cocaine alkaloid reacts with the hydrochloric acid to produce a damp, powdery substance that remains at the bottom of the bowl after the ether and acetone are poured off. This is coke hydrochloride, ready for export as soon as it dries. Thats one way to make crack.
Another way is to dissolve cocaine hydrochloride in a mixture of water and ammonia and then cooked it, to form crystalline rocks - potent, highly addictive crack! This drug can be smoked and thereby absorbed very quickly into the bloodstream, without recourse to the dangerous ether-fueled hookahs used to smoke, or free-base, regular coke. In addition to being more potent than coke powder, crack is cheaper. On the street, a gram of cocaine costs between $25-50, but since a relatively small amount of cocaine hydrochloride can be converted into a sizable chunk of crack, prices are kept down. An individual hit of crack can sell for as little as $5, making it an affordable alternative.
I hope that in teaching you the ways of making crack, you will spread the knowledge and enjoy your own crack much more!

This is the most believable picture I have ever seen in my entire life.